COVID, Anxiety and The New Normal
BY ALLY HUGHES
Fear and excitement filled my body when we got the long anticipated email about returning to the lab after lockdown. I began this year in the West Highlands of Scotland, In a beautiful coastal town called Oban, with a population of 8,500. I was there for an internship as part of my PhD with a marine biotechnology company, Xanthella Ltd. This was due to finish in April when I would return to Glasgow for the final year of my degree at the University of Strathclyde. Alas, lockdown happened and I spent the summer wandering along the promenade, taking great comfort from the rhythmic ebb and flow of the Atlantic Ocean. The University of Strathclyde allowed every staff member and postgraduate student a rest day every week during lockdown, to look after our mental health and caring responsibilities, and wow did I need that day of rest every single week. My normal disposition is that of a PhD student with anxiety, so add a pandemic to that mix and it becomes a blubbering, chaotic mess very quickly. Moving back to Glasgow in June, just as lockdown was easing, was equally stressful. I was leaving the beautiful scenic west coast to return to a city that was a hotspot for the virus we all feared. But I was back now, and slowly adjusting, when finally, we were being allowed back into the lab. I was so excited...and terrified!
Sunny day in Oban, Scotland!
Our department set a strict one-way system around each floor and the building as a whole, and to begin we were only allowed in 3 days per week to give us time to adjust back to being at work. They posted a video tour of the building online, ironically with Taylor Swift's Trouble playing in the background. However, watching it really helped prepare me for what it was going to be like upon my return. After online safety training, we were invited in small groups for a lab induction where the new rules and system were clearly explained. The following week, wondering if I still knew how to use a pipette, I headed into my "new normal." Those first few days encompassed endless laps around the new one-way system (like a manual merry-go-round) and checking in with my old lab buddies at safe distances. I actually wrote out step-by-step instructions for myself for those first few days so I wouldn't become overwhelmed or suffer from an anxiety attack. Those detailed instructions helped me to stay focused and although I was EXHAUSTED, I made it through my first week without too many glitches.
I might not look it but I’m happy to be back, I swear!
It was strange being back, and we were all worried, but it was motivating to have a reason to get up and out the door again. Being back in the lab boosted my motivation which had been practically non-existent for weeks. And having some semblance of a routine again really helped calm my anxiety as I spent far less time lying in bed in the mornings scrolling through the doom and gloom of the world. Myself and my supervisor agreed on how this period away from the lab would impact my thesis and laid out a plan to get back on track with my objectives. Then, after about 6 weeks back, I was notified by the Scottish Track and Trace team that I was a close contact of someone with COVID and that I must isolate for 14 days. This was devastating, not only from a research perspective but also because I was planning to return home for my brother’s wedding, and to see my family for the first time this year. It really knocked me and all the anxiety that I had felt during lockdown came flooding back. I also had a three-week experiment that I wouldn’t be able to finish. Great, even more time lost!
But luckily I work in a lab that has always functioned as a team, and we've continued to do that in gusto since our return. As soon as I let my colleagues know of my situation (worrying they would hate me if I caused an outbreak), they jumped in with offers to help me wrap up my experiment and drop off any essentials. I sent through ridiculously detailed instructions, and my lab buddies brought the experiment to a point that my cultures could be frozen for me to resume the experiment when I returned. Because I didn’t lose out on the work from those weeks, I was able to reschedule my trip home. I will still miss my brother’s wedding as I will have to quarantine when I get to Ireland, but I will be home for my nephew and niece’s birthdays for the first time in years. This is not the only example of our group looking after one another. We’ve had people nominate themselves to put on overnight cultures for everyone so we can utilise time in the lab more efficiently. And we have a weekly meeting on Zoom for everyone working on the floor to discuss any issues and troubleshoot problems that arise. I couldn’t be more grateful to work with this bunch and it’s really hammered home how important it is that we face this crisis as a community, with understanding and compassion, so that the “new normal” emerging from all this is one that we are proud to be part of , with a greater appreciation for the things that truly matter in life.